|Non-Violent Communication, Trumped Up Nation
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We need to communicate differently. The levels of perceived conflict ar high and in a civil society, we have to effectively communicate to build a stronger nation.
NVC is a “language of life” that helps us to transform old patterns of defensiveness and aggressiveness into compassion and empathy and to improve the quality of all of our relationships.
Studying and practicing NVC creates a foundation for learning about ourselves and our relationships in every moment, and helps us to remain focused on what is happening right here, right now.
Although it is a model for communication, NVC helps us to realize just how important connection is in our lives. In fact, having the intention to connect with ourselves and others is one of the most important goals of practicing and living NVC. We live our lives from moment to moment, yet most of the time we are on autopilot, reacting out of habit rather than out of awareness and presence of mind.
By creating a space for attention and respect in every moment, NVC helps create a pathway and a practice that is accessible and approachable.
What is Non-Violent Communication?
- Why do we need NVC?
- How to engage in NVC?
- Human Motivations
- Tools for better communication
The Model The basic model for NVC is really quite straightforward and simple. We will walk through a PDF Workbook that will be provided, nor need to buy aditional resources for this course.
You will be connected to video/webinar using your computer\'s microphone and speakers. A headset is recommended.
WEBINAR System Requirements:
- PC-based attendees Required: Windows 7, Vista, XP or 2003 Server
- Mac-based attendees Required: Mac OS X 10.6 or newer
- Mobile attendees Required: iPhone, iPad, Android phone or Android tablet
- It is a process that combines four components with two parts. While the four components are specific ideas and actions that fit into the form and the model of NVC, the two parts provide a solid foundation for NVC as well as for living nonviolently.
- They are the basis for Marshall’s ideas of giving and receiving from the heart. These brief definitions will be expounded further in the sections below:
- 1. Observation: Observation without evaluation consists of noticing concrete things and actions around us. We learn to distinguish between judgment and what we sense in the present moment, and to simply observe what is there.
- 1. Feeling: When we notice things around us, we inevitably experience varying emotions and physical sensations in each particular moment. Here, distinguishing feelings from thoughts is an essential step to the NVC process.
- 1. Needs: All individuals have needs and values that sustain and enrich their lives. When those needs are met, we experience comfortable feelings, like happiness or peacefulness, and when they are not, we experience uncomfortable feelings, like frustration. Understanding that we, as well as those around us, have these needs is perhaps the most important step in learning to practice NVC and to live empathically.
- 1. Request: To make clear and present requests is crucial to NVC’s -3- transformative mission. When we learn to request concrete actions that can be carried out in the present moment, we begin to find ways to cooperatively and creatively ensure that everyone’s needs are met.
- 1. Empathy: Receiving from the heart creates a means to connect with others and share experiences in a life enriching way. Empathy goes beyond compassion, allowing us to put ourselves into another’s shoes to sense the same feelings and understand the same needs; in essence, being open and available to what is alive in others. It also gives us the means to remain present to and aware of our own needs and the needs of others even in extreme situations that are often difficult to handle.
- 1. Honesty: Giving from the heart has its root in honesty. Honesty begins with truly understanding ourselves and our own needs, and being in tune with what is alive in us in the present moment.
When we learn to give ourselves empathy, we can start to break down the barriers to communication that keep us from connecting with others.
From these four components and two parts, Marshall has created a model for life enriching communication that can be highly effective in solving our conflict with our family members, with our friends, with our coworkers, and with ourselves.
“Through innovative and interactive diversity education, personal empowerment, and team building, we help individuals and organizations approach old problems with new solutions.”
- Our approach is simple: We help Government and Educational organizations manage and train staff, employees, and clients on diversity issues without blame, fault or guilt.
- We understand that people are doing the best they can with what they have. Yet we encourage them to examine themselves, explore other cultures, and become allies for others.
- We work to move people's behaviors not by pushing them or making them feel guilty.
- We dissect, analyze, and making meaning of the issues that challenge us in a fair, balanced way that people can hear and understand.
- We motivate individuals to create something collaboratively.
What people are saying about our sessions
- I have always understood the importance of context when it comes to understanding each other, but the examples he used (the farmer going to New York and vice versa) just resonated with me and opened my eyes even wider. This actually has helped me at home in my relationship with my boyfriend. Andre’s lecture reminds me that we just simply have different contexts and perspectives. And recognizing this is half the battle.
~ Jeffery Staple, Florida
- I will always remember to embrace differences and to think about why people may have biases, or negative thoughts towards others and to be patient and willing to challenge those biases or negative thoughts.
~Terry Anderson, Iowa
- This was powerful...one unexpected idea/fact I learned from this presentation/video was: how openly disclosed racism was in the media. By watching that episode of Arche Bunker I was confused because I thought it was hilarious and was sitting in the back of the class laughing, hard. It wasn’t until the speaker broke down the main characters “bigotry” that I realized I was blind to the reality of that television shows effect on others. I didn’t see it as wrong in the moment it was playing, so I realize now that there must be other times in my daily life that things are hurtful and offensive to other and I have no idea it’s going on.
~ Brenda Jonas, Ohio